Communication

Happy Belated Canada Day! And Happy Independence Day America!

We all know the power of good communication but seldom do we actively and consistently use it, especially in marital relationships. We are too careful of our word choices (or not careful enough), fret over the consequences of our sharing and the vulnerability that may be attached. But boy oh boy, once the words and thoughts and ideas are shared... a relationship can flourish.
I recently shared something with my husband that I should have (could have, would have...hindsight is yet another powerhouse!) done years ago. I know to some extent why I didn't and wonder why. But now it's out and our relationship is that much stronger. I didn't realize what that issue harbored! Resentment, dislike, distrust to name a few. It's a weight off my shoulders and life is good once again. The ebb and flow of marriage!

Drinking

On Saturday I went out. Whaoooo. I don't get out enough so each time I do, it's a monumental occassion. I drank... a lot. At the time it was good, chocolate martini, ceasar, gin, beer and wine. Each one tastier than the next. And for what?

My drunken sleep, my groggy awakening with a hint of drunkeness and bam... hang over. Now I am blessed/cursed with getting minor hangovers. I am foggy, cranky, slow and moody. These may seem mild symptoms but in hindsight, they dent and tarnish my character.

For YEARS, I drank like a fish, squandering my money and time to feel a bit more free and happy for a couple hours. The days that followed were ruined, little to no ambition, my reputation tainted and my bank account... Sigh.

For YEARS, I lived like this! By nature I am sensitive. SO being hungover exaggerated this, which in turn, made me a basket case.

Hindsight is a great thing eh?! Well, my past is tarnished but now I need to get the baking soda, salt and vinegar out to clean it up.

Good bye, so long, farewell my liquid friend!

Saddened

Well my husband and I worked out our finances last night. Bleak. I don't understand how people live these days. It seems like everyone carries a debt. I am not comfortable carrying a debt, it's heavy and depressing. You start to feel guilty spending money on 'frivolous' things! It's the frivol that brightens a day! I am wearing clothes that are five years old, thank god I have a classic style so it's all IN style still.

It looks like we either have to find more income or move. I alread feel strapped for time! Mother duties, household duties, prep for work and wifeliness. Not one job is done well. That bothers me.

Any whine... I need pull my chin up and think of what I can do to create some cash in a reasonable fashion. My immediate options are tutoring, taking an international student or prostitution! HA HA! Time management!

Yes, I could go back to work full time but then someone else raises my children. That's not for us. I see the effects of this daycare raised society and I don't like what I see. A child needs their parents attention, guidance etc... and they will always desire that over anyone else!

Anyway, I am rambling, something I am good at. Remember I am trying to learn to write through this venue. So I shall come to a close.

Hopeful

I have read seveal blogs on different topics and I am amazed at what is shared and how well things are written. While I am not a strong writer, I enjoy the challenge. I am starting this blog to communicate, learn to write better and share.

That's all.